Submission is one of those concepts that everyone talks about, yet few understand fully.
A lot of the confusion comes from the fact that Paul and Peter use different metaphors when discussing submission, and because there are different entities who submit in different ways: Christians within the church submit to each other in one way, husbands and wives submit to each other in another way, and Christians submit to those outside the church in a third way.
The largest amount of information that deals with submission in the New Testament talks about the Body of Christ. Paul spends considerable time describing how the Body of Christ functions, and how the different members work together.
Just as each of us has
one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same
function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs
to all the others (Rom 12:4-5 NIV).
The body is a unit,
though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they
form one body. So it is with Christ. For we were all baptized by one Spirit
into one body-whether Jews or Greeks, slave or free-and we were all given the
one Spirit to drink (1 Cor 12:12-13, NIV).
You are all sons of
God through faith in Christ Jesus, for all of you who were baptized into Christ
have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor
free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. If you belong to
Christ, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise
(Gal 3:26-29, NIV).
Then we will no longer
be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by
every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their
deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things
grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body,
joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up
in love, as each part does its work (Eph 4:14-16, NIV).
Let the peace of
Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to
peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach
and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and
spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do,
whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks
to God the Father through him (Col 3:15-17, NIV).
According to the early church
writer, Clement of Rome, believers submit to each other through their spiritual
gifts.
Let us take our body for an example. The head is nothing without the
feet, and the feet are nothing without the head; yea, the very smallest members
of our body are necessary and useful to the whole body. But all work (lit. all
breathe together) harmoniously together, and are under one common rule (lit. use one subjection) for the preservation of
the whole body. Let our whole body,
then, be preserved in, Christ Jesus; and let every one be subject to his neighbour, according to the special gift
(lit. according as he has been placed in his charism) bestowed upon him.[1]
How do we submit to each other through our spiritual gifts?
We submit when we allow other members exercise their gifts without disruptions.
This thought is expressed in 1 Cor 14:29-33:
"Two or three prophets should speak, and the others should weigh carefully what is said. And if a revelation comes to someone who is sitting down, the first speaker should stop. For you can all prophesy in turn so that everyone may be instructed and encouraged. The spirits of prophets are subject to the control of prophets. For God is not a God of disorder but of peace" (NIV).
Corinthians were confused about the meaning of the gifts;
they thought they were given for their own personal gain.
"For this reason anyone who speaks in a tongue should pray that he may interpret what he says. For if I pray in a tongue, my spirit prays, but my mind is unfruitful. So what shall I do? I will pray with my spirit, but I will also pray with my mind; I will sing with my spirit, but I will also sing with my mind. If you are praising God with your spirit, how can one who finds himself among those who do not understand say "Amen" to your thanksgiving, since he does not know what you are saying? You may be giving thanks well enough, but the other man is not edified. … What then shall we say, brothers? When you come together, everyone has a hymn, or a word of instruction, a revelation, a tongue or an interpretation. All of these must be done for the strengthening of the church" (1 Cor 14:13-17, 26 NIV).
We submit when we choose to use our gifts to serve others, for the spiritual gifts were given for the profit of all (1 Cor 12:7). Because all members in the body submit to one another, even
overseers submit to those younger in faith when they exercise their gifts.
"As every man hath received the gift, even so minister the same one to another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God. If any man speak, let him speak as the oracles of God; if any man minister, let him do it as of the ability which God giveth: that God in all things may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom be praise and dominion for ever and ever. Amen. …. Likewise, ye younger, submit yourselves unto the elder. Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble" (1 Peter 4:10-11; 5:5, KJV).
However, when talking about marriage, Paul compares the husband to Christ, and the wife to the Church, instead of speaking of the individual
members of the church, and for a good reason. The relationship between Christ and Church mirrors that of
husband and wife; they become one flesh.
"After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church- for we are members of his body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery-but I am talking about Christ and the church" (Eph 5:29-32, NIV).
We belong to Jesus.
"So, my brothers, you also died to the law through the body of Christ, that you might belong to another, to him who was raised from the dead, in order that we might bear fruit to God" (Rom 7:4, NIV).
Just as the church belongs to Jesus, so does a husband and
wife belong to each other.
"The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife" (1 Cor 7:4, NIV).
How does the Church submit to Christ? The Church submits to Christ when it speaks truth in love
and grows into him in all things.
"Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work" (Eph 4:15-16, NIV).
The Church loses the connection to the head when it clings to
the shadows of the law and human commandments instead of coming to Jesus, who
is the reality and truth.
"Therefore do not let anyone judge you by what you eat or drink, or with regard to a religious festival, a New Moon celebration or a Sabbath day. These are a shadow of the things that were to come; the reality, however, is found in Christ. Do not let anyone who delights in false humility and the worship of angels disqualify you for the prize. Such a person goes into great detail about what he has seen, and his unspiritual mind puffs him up with idle notions. He has lost connection with the Head, from whom the whole body, supported and held together by its ligaments and sinews, grows as God causes it to grow" (Col 2:16-19, NIV).
Just as Jesus lives to pray and intercede for the
Church (Heb 7:25), and the Church lives to pray and bear fruit for God, so does a husband
and wife live to please each other.
"I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs-how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world-how he can please his wife- and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world-how she can please her husband" (1 Cor 7:32-34, NIV).Hierarchical theologians would have us believe that a husband pleases his wife when he provides for her, and a wife pleases her husband when she cares for the home. That is, however, not the case.
For as our original parents lived and loved in the garden, they did so without care and concern for their material wellbeing; God provided all things for the newly created humans. The existence of sin is the reason Paul recommended singleness, for marriage in a fallen world comes with a lot of concern and worry. Yet, marriage is not the reason we were created; we were created to reflect the glory of God as image bearers and care for the created world.
Because we belong to Jesus, if we lose our connection to the
head, the body withers away just as a branch that is not connected to the root.
"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned." (John 15:5-6, NIV)
What keeps us connected to the head is love.
"As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love" (John 15:9, NIV).
In a marriage, love is what connects the head to the body; Paul told husbands to love their wives the way Jesus loves
the church.
"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself" (Eph 5:25-28, NIV).
We have a tendency to see the obedience the Church owes to
Christ as an excuse for husbands to demand their wives follow their every
selfish preference. Note that Paul said Christ died to make the Church holy. The husband must love his wife in the same way
as the Christ loved the Church: he must in all things abstain from demanding his wife sin
against her own conscience by demanding she follow his preferences.
"So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the man who does not condemn himself by what he approves. But the man who has doubts is condemned if he eats, because his eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin." (Rom 14:22-23, NIV).
Jesus gave
us only one commandment: love and serve another. Jesus expects the same from
everyone; he does not show partiality, nor does he prefer one over the other.
This is the model the husband should emulate: he should love his wife the way
he loves himself and not expect more from his wife than he is willing to do himself.
Because the life of love is that of submission, but not all
humans are in Christ, Christians
submit to those outside the body in a different way as they do within the body:
they submit by doing good. Slaves with harsh master submit by accepting the
consequences of doing good; wives with unbelieving husbands submit through
their pure and respectful conduct; husbands with unbelieving wives submit
through consideration and respect (1 Pet 2-3). All Christians submit to their governments
by doing that which is good, and by showing proper respect (Rom 13). In none of the
above is a Christian expected, or allowed, to transgress God’s law of loving their
neighbors and God with all their beings.
It is a rather sobering to realize that
hierarchical theology, by giving husbands and overseers near total power over
wives and laity, imposes the submission owed to unbelievers by Christians on
the Church and Christian marriage. By admonishing wives and laity (and slaves)
to obey, and allowing husbands and overseers to have their way in all things, hierarchical
theologians have elevated sin to the throne of the hearts of all believers (Rom 6:12).
Only by returning to biblical equality can we re-learn how to submit to each other within the Body of Christ and in Christian marriage.
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